Good Giving Weekly: FACING F.E.A.R. October 1, 2018
Greetings #29Gifts Community,
Welcome new www.29gifts.org members and veterans. I start each round on the first of the month, so today is my new Day 1. Are you afraid of anything as you give 29 gifts in 29 days? Do you have any questions for me? Post them in the comments and I will respond. In my 12-Step Meetings I’ve been told that F.E.A.R can be an acronym for False Evidence Appearing Real or Face Everything And Recover.
WHAT DO I F.E.A.R? I have an appointment with a new Psychiatrist today to address exacerbation of my Post Traumatic Stress Disorder symptoms. Many of us sexual abuse survivors have had to relive memories due to press about Supreme Court nominee Brett Kavanaugh’s sexual assault investigation. Today I am coming out as member of the growing #MeToo movement. I am struggling with flashbacks and old memories that I am consciously attempting to put back to bed.
I have been sexually assaulted multiple times. The first time I was four at daycare. Two older boys lured me into a tent, removed my pants and fondled me. A female teacher discovered us the third time it happened. She punished me, but not the boys. At age 12, I experienced an attempted date rape involving alcohol, not unlike the story Christine Blasey Ford told at the Senate hearings. My 14-year old boyfriend took me to a small movie party with some friends. I prevented him from taking off my pants as we were kissing under a blanket in the dark by kneeing him in the balls The struggle happened under a blanket in the dark and I never called out for help even though other kids were in the room. I was raped once in college and once six years ago before I quit drinking again this last time around.
I have to go under general anesthesia twice in the next six weeks. I bleed very heavily for more than a week every month even though I have every symptom of menopause. The doctors tried putting me on birth control (estrogen), but it hasn’t stopped the bleeding. First they will put me under to take a biopsy to make sure there is no cancer. (I have a history of precancerous growth so please pray for a clear biopsy.) I go back a week later for a surgical procedure where they cut out the fibroids in my uterus and do D&C (dilation and curettage) a procedure where the opening the cervix is widened and the lining of the uterus is scraped away. Last they do an endometrial ablation procedure to remove the lining of the uterus to reduce bleeding. The recovery will take 5-7 days. It’s supposed to be an outpatient procedure, but they will admit me if they can’t keep my pain under control when I wake up.
I wanted to share some personal fears that I am trying to work through and accept. Acceptance and turning this over to God are key to overcome fear. Please share any of your own fears with me and our #29Gifts community by commenting on this post.
REMINDER: BE GENEROUS WITH YOURSELF In October, I encourage you to start each day with gratitude and try giving a gift to yourself. Giving to yourself not only “counts” as part of your #29Gifts–it serves as a reminder that you are worthy of receiving. It increases your sense of abundance and rejuvenates your spirit. Try giving gifts of self care like warm baths, reading, or other stress relievers. What kind of gifts would fill your well? Comment to add your own ideas.
SEEKING STORIES - DEADLINE OCTOBER 29, 2018 Write a 2,000-word personal essay submission for my second book. 29 Life Lessons: Reflections On Living and Giving is the much anticipated sequel to Cami Walker’s New York Times Bestselling self-help memoir, 29 Gifts: How A Month of Giving Can Change Your Life. 29 Life Lessons includes personal stories from Walker and members of the 29 Gifts global community, self-help prompts, and creative giving tips. Get submission guidelines and read three stories from me here. http://follr.com/Communities/29Gifts/ViewPost/74108
TROOPER TRAINING AND TOOTH FAIRY FUND Thanks to everyone who has given financial gifts to help Trooper (my rescue dog) train to be a Therapy and Service Dog. I still need help getting to my $2,300 goal for private dog training costs and for additional dental work for me. Please give if you can and share this link in the spirit of community! https://www.gofundme.com/help-cami-break-free-from-ptsd-ms
GIVEAWAYS WANTED Are you an artist, author, healer or entrepreneur who wants to share a product or service with the #29Gifts community? Sponsor a Great Giveaway. Direct Message me if you are interested.
GIVE BACK TO 29GIFTS.ORG I invite you to join our 29 Gifts Community Team. Help welcome new members and start conversations on www.29gifts.org. You can also organize group gives in your area. When I was traveling and speaking about 29 Gifts, I organized Flower Power Gives in each city I visited. Read about my first Flower Power Give in 2008. https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/get-your-give/200908/flower-power-give
SUPPORT 29 GIFTS Please invite friends to join you at www.29gifts.org. "Like" and Share http://www.facebook.com/29gifts. Use the tag #29Gifts on your social media posts. Follow Cami on Twitter or Snapchat @camiwalker29 and at https://www.instagram.com/camillaswalker. Click on Documents to download free 29 Gifts Note Cards and other fun giving tools.
Good Giving! Cami Walker Chief Evangelist, 29gifts.org